Are you in your war room?

I saw a really good movie last night, “War Room”. Often Christian movies can be a little corny and contrived but this one hit the mark for me. Of course the cynic in me and the cynic among us will say that things aren’t always just like we see in this movie. The other side of the coin is that I personally have experienced what’s in this movie and it changed my life.

It’s not exactly a low budget film but it’s no Hollywood extravagance either. A young wealthy African-American man and his wife are having marriage difficulties when the wife meets a woman a generation older than her, Miss Clara, also African-American. Over coffee Miss Clara learns of Elizabeth’s despair about her marriage and she suggests that a Christian and Godly approach to the trouble would be to fight the problem in prayer and with spiritual weapons to get at the root of the difficulties: sin, forgiveness and the huge need of them all for God’s grace.

In one sense it’s a very modern movie, dealing with modern problems. But in another sense it’s a throwback to the storylines of 60 or 70 years ago. Once upon a time, it was common to have happy endings to movies. Like the famous movie with Jimmy Steward, “It’s a Wonderful Life”, things all work out in the end. That type of movie fell out of vogue long ago and so often in more recent times there’ll be some horrific ending, some depressing tale ending in death and defeat for everyone. But the thing is, for those who are in the Lord and are holding on to Him and His will, there really are happy endings, just like in this movie.

Elizabeth, the wife, after some early stumbles, finally gets down to real and desperate prayer in her “War Room”, a cleaned out closet in her house, after seeing the example of how Miss Clara had done the same at her house. I hate to say it but somehow I feel it does work better to have the lead characters in the movie be African-American. I know white folks who are just as messed up as this young wealthy couple. And also I know white folks who are just as adept at storming the gates of heaven through desperate prayer to get answers as is Miss Clara. But for this movie and for the purpose of the producers, it seems to work better with things the way they’ve done it.

So after Elizabeth getting her own repentance and personal house in order, she continues to pray desperately as she literally fulfills the words of Jesus to “enter into your closet and shut the door and pray to your father in secret.” (Matthew 6:6) And, as the Lord said, the “Father which sees in secret shall reward you openly.” Elizabeth’s husband, a very successful man by wordly standards, comes to his senses of the heart that he’s been a failure to his wife and daughter to love them and a failure to God in his hard heartedness.

Well, there’s more to it but this is the gist of it. Not a bad story line at all and certainly one that’s as needed to be seen in our times, as ever. But the original twist in some ways is that the “war” has to be won in personal, fervent prayer, repentance, confession and then going on the attack against the devil to be able to regain the ground lost to “the prince of this world”. (John 12:31)

The movie of course was panned by critics but, not surprisingly, it’s become a pretty successful movie at the box office. I personally really liked it and agree with everything that they portrayed there. If I had any qualms, it would maybe be from the perspective of someone who’s lived outside the USA for over 30 years of my adult life. The movie was evidently made and directed towards an American audience. Some scenes were reminiscent of somewhat frothy American television productions and at times I did  wonder how those in Berlin or Budapest would view and react to what they were seeing. But for those who can rise above the chummy, feel-good Americana portions of the film, the actually message and spiritual reality that’s being portrayed there is five star.

I was glad to see that there wasn’t a whisper of politics in the film and the actors all evidently really knew personally what they were trying to portray. Miss Clara in particular, the elderly African-American prayer warrior (played by Karen Abercrombie) was excellent. Again, a quibble, I’m from the southern USA and I could understand her accent without a problem. But possibly those outside the USA might have difficulty understanding Miss Clara’s southern, African-American drawl.

Overall I’d say this is a great movie and one I’d recommend. Of course if you are a smug, staunch unbeliever and scoff at prayer, you’ll probably not watch it. Or maybe you’re somewhere in between faith in God and unbelief? In that case, I’d say you should check it out.

What’s in this movie isn’t exactly what happened to me but some of it is mighty close. I had to go through some forceful breakings of my stubborn will and hardened heart by the hand of God. And it was only the undeserved grace of God I ever pulled through into the wonderful life I’ve had for many years. This movie well portrays the spiritual realities of desperate prayer, repentance, fighting spiritual warfare through prayer and the intervention of God in our lives. It’s a good movie; I hope you’ll check it out.

Suicide

To me, suicide is a terrible, horrible thing. I’ve had times in my life where that thought came to me but there were just too many reasons not to do it. But it does seem to claim many lives in our times. Despair and hopelessness come upon us in mighty waves and to end our life seems to be the only way out. But what stopped me was to consider the effect it would have on others, particularly my children.

The Bible says, “None of us lives to himself and no man dies to himself.” (Romans 14:7) We all have influence. We are all in one way or the other tied to each other.If one member suffers, the whole body suffers.” (I Corinthians 12:26) I’ve known people who’ve committed suicide. Some of them were good friends, others were people I knew or heard about. I have friends who had a parent who committed suicide when they were a kid. They didn’t talk about it much but I could tell it had a deep and severe effect on them.

Suicidal thoughts make you feel utterly separated from everyone else. In my view, it’s similar to those who commit murder, only in this case the person you kill is yourself, rather than someone else. But it comes back to utter hopelessness, utter despair and an outlook that life has turned out so bad that there’s no reason left to live at all. But like I said, when I got to that point a few times, it was thinking about my children and the legacy it would leave them that turned me away from doing it.

Also, for those of us who believe in God and in Jesus, we just know better about the realities of life than to be taken over by such horrendously hopeless thoughts. If you know God and if you know His Word, you just know that however bad things look right now, it’s not really the end. No matter how much you blew it, no matter how much people mistreat you or abuse you or hate you, there’s Someone much greater than our present circumstances, no matter how bad they are.

The psalms of David, which are mostly prayers, are some of the most comforting and strengthening passages in the Bible. David certainly knew the utter depths of despair, hopelessness and even dread. He was very human, he said things he shouldn’t have said and did things that he shouldn’t have done. But still through it all the Lord never gave up on David and ended up mightily blessing his life. David said this one time,

My sore ran in the night and did not stop; my soul refused to be comforted. I remembered God and was troubled; I complained and my spirit was overwhelmed. You, God, keep my eyes awake. I am so troubled that I cannot speak. I have considered the days of old, the years of ancient times. I called to remembrance my song in the night. I commune with my own heart and my spirit made diligent search.  Will the Lord cast off forever? Will he be favorable no more? Is His mercy completely gone forever? Do His promises fail for evermore? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has He in anger shut up His tender mercies? And I said, “This is my infirmity. But I will remember the years of the right hand of the most High. I will remember the works of the Lord, surely I will remember Your wonders of old. I will meditate also of all Your work and talk of Your doings.” (Psalm 77:2-12)

King David knew the depths of despair and hopelessness. But what did he do in this prayer? He turned. He turned from a stream of hopelessness and began to say, “But I will remember…”, he actually says that three times in a row. David started to get his mind and train of thought on the faithfulness of God and God’s plan for his life, rather than the incredibly difficult circumstances he was in.

Let me change this around for a moment. I want to talk to you, from me to you. Are you being spoken to by thoughts of suicide? Maybe off and on for a long time? My friend, fight it. Or if you think you’re too weak to fight it, call out to God to deliver you. It’s not too big for Him.

If someone evil broke into your house and tried to carry off your children or even your dog, you’d fight them. Well, it’s worse than that. Someone has broken into the house of your mind and is trying to carry you off to your death.

And maybe you don’t even love yourself anymore but I venture to say others do. Others will miss you terribly. Others will be soul-struck that you are no longer here, that you are no longer part of their lives.

And even if you think you don’t have any friends or family, God Himself has got better ideas and plans for you than that you take your life. Why not give your life to help others? God specializes in using weak things, little things, nothings that He can make something out of. God usually has to make absolutely nothing out of someone before He can use them. Maybe that’s where you are now.

But the devil comes along (and, yes, that’s who it is, the devil) and tries to tell you that it’s too late, you’re washed up and there’s nothing left to do but kill yourself. Jesus said of the devil that he was a murderer from the beginning and he’s trying to get you to commit murder, your own.

DON’T DO IT. Get help. Are you on some medication? A lot of those have side effects that bring on suicidal thoughts. You might need to check that out. Pour out your heart to God. Read the Bible, maybe the Psalms of David and let God’s Word speak to your heart. Fill your mind and heart with positive, encouraging, faith-building thoughts from the Word of God.

If your willpower doesn’t seem to work, try your “won’t power”. If you can’t find a way forward, at least you don’t have to start going backwards. Just slam on the breaks and sit tight in prayer and reading the Word until the storm passes. It will. It did for me. I’ve been through this and I’m mighty glad I didn’t take my life in times of some of my darkest despair.

You are valuable to others and to God. You are loved and needed and you mater. Hold on. It can and will get better and you can go on to the light of a brighter day that will make the present darkness be something you eventually no longer remember. Hold on. You are loved and needed.

Intimacy in Cyberspace ?

Intimacy. Let’s admit it: we all want that. Physically, yes; but even as much or more that union of heart with heart with another kindred soul. Jesus prayed to His Father, “That they all may be one, as You, Father are in me and I in you.” (John 17:21) Some have it in their families, mothers and fathers, husbands and wives, brothers and sisters, the special feeling you have with your grandparents.

Intimacy is one of the most desired, sought and even most needed things we have in our lives. And now in our times we have the internet and cyberspace which has made it possible to be in contact basically with nearly anyone anywhere in the world. It’s certainly been a huge thing in my life to where much of my time is based around the material I post on line and communications I have all over the world with people I work with or with ones who’ve viewed or read my material

But am I enjoying intimacy in these settings? Is cyberspace satisfying the deepest desires of my soul and heart? In one sense I can definitely say no. On the other hand, equally I also have to say that some of my interactions with this vast assembly of friends and acquaintances have definitely been very satisfying and encouraging.

Maybe it comes down to what it takes to really satisfy each individual. Some know what real intimacy is like. It can be pinnacle experiences you’ve had in your relationship with God and Christ. It can be those incredible moments of bonding and unity with your mate, where you know you are truly loving that person and are being loved. Even times with your best friend, sharing your heart, being listened to and understood, even that can be a form of intimacy. And of course the interactions we have with our families, when things are going really well, is also a degree of intimacy that can sometimes be sustained over many years.

So how does cyberspace work as being an avenue of intimacy? While it’s been truly fantastic for me personally in being able to reach out across continents to where I’m getting to know folks in places like Rwanda, Dagestan, Nagaland and even remote towns where there are no roads to those places, it still doesn’t beat the real thing.

Real time. Face time. Human to human, right-in-front-of-you where you can see their face, hold their hand, hear their voice. That still is the benchmark of intimacy. We’re not cyborgs. We’re flesh and blood human beings who know the true and full reality when we see it. Cyberspace has been an incredible blessing. But for me it’s not been able to replace the need for traditional reality that humanity has known for millennia.

So, like for probably millions of people, “I still haven’t found what I’m looking for.” In the Lord I certainly have. “You are complete in Him.” (Colossians 2:10) But it’s also true that, “It is not good for man to be alone.” (Genesis 2:18) Even when Adam had God with him in the Garden in a closeness most of us can’t even imagine, God still knew that Adam needed someone like himself beside him. And it’s still the same today.

While I’m thankful for the mass of friends and acquaintances I’ve come to have through the internet, I have to be honest and say that this other aspect of my life, real-time, face-time traditional reality intimacy with others is still pretty lacking in some respects and I feel it a lot.

I can imagine that very many people have turned to cyberspace to try to satisfy the aching void so many feel of the need for real closeness, even true intimacy. I don’t know if you could compare it to those who turn to alcohol or drugs to relieve their heartache but maybe there’s a comparison. But on the internet, you’re mostly interacting with someone real, an actual individual at the other end of a Facebook chat or your email message. So it’s not like alcohol really in that sense. But it can only go so far.

Does intimacy imply ecstasy? No. Solomon said, “Ointment and perfume rejoice the heart, so does the sweetness of a man’s friend by hearty council.” (Proverbs 27:9) It’s like what I wrote about in “Jonathan, son of Saul”. Evidently King David and Saul’s son Jonathan had a very deep and strong friendship. But there never was any hint of anything physical about it.

Every person needs real, deep intimacy. That’s what we have with God through Jesus. “There is one God and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus.” (I Timothy 2:5) We are restored, we are reconciled to God in Christ. And those things can bring joys and emotions that words sometimes can’t really reach.

And yet…, and yet we who are still here in this world most of the time still need others. We also need human love. Unity, contact, oneness. It says in the Bible, “Now we know in part, but then shall we know, even as we are known.” (I Corinthians 13:12)

It sounds like, in heaven, intimacy will be the coinage of the realm, intimacy with Christ and God but also with an incredible oneness with each other. But here…? Well, thank God for the internet and the good that has come of it. Still, for me at least I yet yearn and long for intimacy in this world and I know that is not really going to come through cyberspace.

It’s going to have to happen in real time, traditional reality. “The greatest of these is love.” (I Corinthians 13:13) God help us to continue in Him and His love. And, if it be His will, love with another human being, even real time intimacy.

Have you ever been “ghosted”?

Have you ever been “ghosted”? I hope not. And I hope you haven’t “ghosted” anyone either. Jesus said of the time before His return that, “The love of many shall grow cold”. (Matthew 24:12) So it’s almost a sign of the times that, in human relationships, “ghosting” has become the new vogue. Here’s a current definition of what “ghosting”:

Ghosting is breaking off a relationship (often an intimate relationship) by ceasing all communication and contact with the former partner without any apparent warning or justification, as well as ignoring the former partner’s attempts to reach out or communicate.

Does that ring a bell? Maybe your best friend suggested, laughingly, that you just “ghost” your current boyfriend or girlfriend because you were going through a rough patch. Life is tough enough, times are tough enough and the outlook for many is bleak enough that this is just another punch in the ribs to our humanity, our standard of behavior and our love for our friends. This is now the cool thing, “Just ghost ‘em.”

I’ve written before about hardening your heart and keeping your heart. This maybe is another aspect of it all, that, (God help us!) we don’t have to revert to the satanic cruelty of this modern form of breaking up so that the person you once loved or were at least close to you now treat with a cruelty you wouldn’t show to a stranger.

Love is under attack at every turn. Decency, altruism and truth itself are rained down upon with new methods of debaucher and disdain so that we’re persuaded that the loftier things we once held dear just are no longer a part of our makeup. We don’t need the Russians, ISIS, immigrant caravans or anything else to attack us from outside. It’s the inside attacks, the insidious “gas seeping under the door” that actually slays far more than those we think are our enemies.

How many die today, they commit suicide because someone they loved “ghosted” them? Sometimes those we love the most can become our greatest enemies. Jesus said so. But it shouldn’t be. It. Should. Not. Be.

The Bible says “Owe no man anything but to love him for he that loves another has fulfilled the law.” (Romans 13:8) You’re not getting along, don’t have those feelings anymore, want to drop ‘em and move on to someone else? Well, even if you do that, you can still be kind. And you should be.

Do you want to have that person’s suicide haunt you the rest of your life? Or want to have that cruel thing you said and did eat away at your conscious the rest of your life? I have things I said when I was 12 years old to a friend of mine who was not as cool as the others and I, going along with the crowd, said some cruel thing to him. He looked me right in the eyes, with tears, and said, “You too, Mark?” He knew that I knew better. He expected me to not be like the other cruel kids in our class. It’s a horrible feeling to know I did that and I regret it to this day.

But how about just “ghosting” your girlfriend or boyfriend? Or your fiancé or even husband or wife? Aren’t we better than that? Even if you’re not a believer, doesn’t love itself call upon us to be kinder to our fellow human being?

I went through a horrific divorce many years ago, one of the worst things I’ve ever experienced. Somehow, through it all, my former wife and I were able to maintain some semblance of communication and measure of respect for the 10 years we spent together and for our 4 children. I tried to never speak against my former wife to my kids. I tried to find slivers and strands of what was left of the relationship and to hold on to those until things could very gradually get better. I’d seen as I grew up, that 30 years before my birth a huge divorce and animosity had had such devastating effects on my relatives that for generations afterwards wounds never healed, over lifetimes.

Don’t be cruel to the ones you love or even to the ones that love you. “Charity suffers long and is kind.” (I Corinthians 13:4) “Love works no ill to his neighbor.” (Romans 13:10) I believe it is just absolutely satanic to turn into the cruelest hatred what was once a love you had for someone. Maybe love has grown cold. Maybe “you’ve lost that loving feeling”. Maybe “you’ve seen them for what they are.” But we still owe everyone love to the degree that we can try to make it easy for the one we are breaking up with.

Hardness of heart can be a form of insanity, one of the worst. It can drive the ones we love to despair and death itself. Don’t do it, any more than you’d do drugs or shoot someone with a gun.

If you are going to break up with someone, try to be kind. Try to not cut them off and stop communicating with them. You’ll be a better person for it, you’ll help the other person to survive the loss of the love that was there and God Himself will bless you for your doing the loving thing.

Commit

Commit, committed, commitment; lots of really important words from the same root. It’s an often familiar concept, not only to Christians but to everyone. Commitment is usually needed at every level of life, not only for success but even for some measure of contentment.

But this morning that root word, “commit” stood out to me as I went to the Lord in prayer. The Bible says so much about “Commit your way unto the Lord, trust also in Him and He shall bring it to pass.” (Psalm 37:5) For the people of faith, this is one of the most essential steps in our spiritual life, one of the most important components of our inner character. The Lord said, “Without me you can do nothing” (John 15:5) and so we are charged throughout the Bible, through one admonition or the other, to “Come boldly to the throne of grace, that you may obtain mercy and find grace to help in the time of need.” (Hebrews 4:16)

I’ve heard that Martin Luther had so much to do one day that his helper, Philip Melanchthon, suggested that they cut their normal lengthy prayer time down so they would have time to do all that was before them. To this Luther replied that actually they would need to double their prayer time so that everything could be accomplished.

I expect that Luther fully understood the necessity of committing things to the Lord in prayer. One of the biggest changes in Luther’s life came in the middle of a lightning storm when he vowed to commit himself to the Lord if God would protect him through the storm.

For Christians there just isn’t any other way. Solomon even said, “Commit your works to the Lord and your thoughts shall be established.” (Proverbs 16:3) God can even clear up your mind from plaguing “vain thoughts” if you take it all to the Lord.

There’s just a ton of Scripture to highlight the importance of committing everything to the Lord. Paul wrote to Timothy about the persecution he was receiving as well as his impending martyrdom, “I know whom I have believed and am persuaded that He is able to keep that which I have committed unto Him against that day.” (II Timothy 1:12)

Paul had committed it all to the Lord. He spoke of this to the Philippians, admonishing them to “Be careful for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God that passes all understanding shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.” (Philippians 4:6 & 7)

That’s certainly one of the benefits of committing things to the Lord in prayer. You’ve laid your burden before the Lord, you’ve “cast all your cares on Him” (I Peter 5:7)  and you can have the peace of God through His Word that He’s going to take care of things. That’s just how it works for the people of faith. That’s the procedure, the contract, the method that God has laid out for us so that we’ll be in His will, we will have committed out way unto Him. And of course it should go without saying that we also continue to be open to His leading and guiding on the mater we’re praying about.

This is what I wrote about in “God will reveal”. The idea of course isn’t or shouldn’t be, “God, here’s what I want to happen! And now, God, make my plans all work out!” Hopefully we know better than that. Even Jesus said to His Father, “Not my will but yours be done.” (Luke 22:42)

It should go without saying that what you’re praying about, what you’re asking God for should already be within His will and what He’s been leading you to do. This is what’s meant in I John 5:14 when it says, “And this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us.

But there has to be, not only commitment but also committing. We have to take it all, every worry, every need, every moment and task of the day to the Lord, asking Him to do it all. “Faithful is He that calls you, who also will do it.” (I Thesselonians 5:24) That’s the kind of results that come from committing our ever concern and action to the Lord.

Paul told the Philippians, “It is God that works in you, both to will and to do of His good pleasure.” (Philipians 2:13) And that happens after you’ve committed it all to the Lord, you are emptied of yourself as you pour out your heart to the Lord in prayer for Him to take over and work in you, through you and with you.

Maybe this isn’t normally a first grade lesson in the school of Christian faith and experience. But whenever it comes up in your life, I believe it’s a grace and quality that’s virtually indispensible in the fullness of the character the Lord wants us to have. I hope you’ve learned to daily commit your life, your thoughts, your heart, your desires, your will and your actions to the Lord. If you do that, He won’t fail to bless you beyond measure for your committing your life to Him.