Monthly Archives: June 2020

Shedding the blood of war in peace

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Some people crack up very easily. The slightest provocation, a hint of disagreement and they just freak out. For some, they take a dive into depression. Others burst forth with a stream of accusations against the person they felt offended by. Sometimes it even goes beyond words to physically violence and death, all because of some perceived slight, something taken the wrong way that was never meant or should have never been blown up to what it was.

Yes, certainly sometimes it was more than a perceived slight. It was long term oppression and injustice and people are outraged about that. I’ll get to that in a moment.

But, about people freaking out and cracking up very easily, you might be one who says, “Happens all the time”. Yes, it does. And the damage done to friendships, families, lives, children, marriages, societies and even nations is often close to irreparable. Some of this gets personal for me. I’ve had a good life in many ways. But also I have seen this kind of destructive behavior up close and have experienced the long term devastation that is not just hurtful but damages almost beyond redemption the souls, hearts and lives it touches.

Jesus said one time, “Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called the children of God.” (Matthew 5:9) In my life, I’ve seen a lot of “domestic warfare”, I guess it could be called. And from seeing this, I came to where I felt the most important thing in life was the wisdom of the heart rather than the intelligence of the mind. I’d seen a lot of smart people who ruined the lives of others without regrets because they were “so smart” but they didn’t care how much they hurt their loved ones, how much they brought disruption to their families.

I have always been in a family that believed in changing the world , that there are serious problems around us in our societies and in the world, injustices that need to be exposed and addressed, causes worth fighting for, staying stirred up about and sacrificing for.

But then, how do you do that? How do you actually address those things, whether in your personal family or in society at large? How vehement do you get? What “weapons” do you use? Are there any tactics that are not allowed? Is there any need for accuracy and truthfulness in what we say and do?  Or is it more important to just be as raw and visceral as you want to be and then let the chips fall where they may? What sacrifices are worth making in order to reach your goal?

There are so many factors in this, so many tangents that could be gone down and explored. But I’ll use an example from history where this subject and difficulty is highlighted. An ancient king, David, had a most trusted and loyal commander of his armed forces, his own cousin Joab. But ultimately, David said of Joab that he had “shed the blood of war in peace”. (I Kings 2:5) Joab murdered a rival military leader in Israel, Abner, who had been the leader of the forces of King Saul.

But it was uncalled for, unprovoked, unnecessary and unwise. The murder of Abner could have easily brought Israel into full civil war between those still loyal to Saul’s regime and the new one of King David. Joab shed the blood of war in peace. He murdered his rival and ultimately Joab was sentenced to death for his crime. He wasn’t in some battle against those bent on destroying his people; he just committed murder because of jealously and rivalry. He shed the blood of war in peace.

But many today do just what Joab did. They fly off the handle at the drop of the hat and feel utterly justified in doing it. Usually it doesn’t end up as a murder but then sometimes it does. But if they don’t commit murder, their words spoken in haste and without love or wisdom go out as firebrands and stick in the hearts of ones who are often friends or loved ones. David’s son, Solomon, said, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue”. (Proverbs 18:21) Words are real things, they bless or they curse, they lift up or they drag down. Jesus even said that we will give an account one day of every word we have spoken.

Again, to remember the words of an ancient king and poet, “I am for peace. But when I speak, they are for war.” (Psalms 120:6) Today I see a lot of vehement people. I even agree with a lot of what they say and the way they see things. There are things that need to be changed, things that have been tolerated for far too long. A good measure of vehemence and righteous exasperation is needed in order to keep some of these subjects on the boil until changes have been made and corners turned.

But I do fear that behind the words and in the hearts of at least some of these folks there is more than just a call for change and justice. There is hatred and vengeance. And a determination to achieve domination over ones they perceive to be utterly evil. I often feel that nothing short of full capitulation and surrender in a most complete sense by their perceived enemies will satisfy a number of these who have grievances. And again you could say, “What’s new? It’s been going on for thousands of years.”

Well, I am for peace. I am for conflict resolution. I’m for standing up to injustice. I’m also for living peaceable with all men. Sadly, I don’t think we are going to have that level of wisdom, unity and civility in this world we have now. It will only happen at the return of “the Prince of Peace“. (Isaiah 9:6) Meanwhile, I am going to do what I can to live within the peace and wisdom of God as much as I can in my interactions with others. And I hope to persuade all I can to do the same.

Ageism

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In her 70’s, my mom said, “I’m old. But I’m not old-old.” But it’s sad and wrong to discriminate against anyone because of their age. And “ageism” is the relatively new word for this. Discrimination is a hurtful but very common thing, worldwide. You’ve heard of “racism”, I’ve written about that several times. And “sexism” is now a common word, usually meaning discrimination against women. But ageism is just as hurtful and also just not smart or even productive.

Both of my parents made it well into their 90’s. It runs in their families. My mom in particular never “lost it” mentally in any way and hardly lost it physically much at all until the last month of two of her life. In earlier generations it was not uncommon that by the time someone hit 60, they were really considered old and were sometimes at the edge of their families who treated them with detached aloofness at times. And often they died sad and alone. Progress has been made in these things and in more recent times there is more concern in many societies for “the elderly”.

But I have to admit I probably could be considered in that category at times, as are now many of my friends. How’s that working for me? Actually, it’s probably a surprise to younger readers but it’s really not too bad. If I go about things wisely, I’ve felt very little drop off in my physical abilities and vitality compared to twenty or more years ago. I’ve got a host of “irons in the fire” and “pots on the stove” that keep me busier than I almost can keep up with. I’m doing fine, as far as I’m concerned.

But it’s disheartening to run into manifestations of ageism. It seems  some folks think that people in their 60’s and 70’s are unquestionably “over the hill”. There’s that hint of condescension from some who try to be polite but you are left with the feeling that they secretly wish we’d just go away. Or at least we’d go someplace else where we are not seen or where we don’t interfere with the way things should be run and done in these times.

Sad stuff. Of course not everyone is like that. But ageism is just as real in our times and felt by folks just as much as is racism or sexism. It’s a waste of human resources as well as a lack of vision. What some short sighted people don’t get is the wealth of knowledge and experience that “older people” have gained. Certainly some folks who are into their 60’s are not able to do as much physically as they did before. But on the other hand many of them are really doing just fine and have a lot of gas in the tank and fire in the belly. The Bible says, “A grey head is a crown of glory, if it be found in the way of righteousness.” (Proverbs 16:31)

But it’s just the inborn sinful nature of mankind to discriminate, to “judge according to the flesh” (John 8:15) and “look on the outward appearance” (I Samuel 16:7), rather than the heart. Also, it must be said that some people “faint in their minds” (Hebrews 12:3), as they grow older. “Where there is no vision the people perish” (Proverb 28:18) and this can happen to people as they age. They give up spiritually and also give up mentally and physically.

However, not everyone does that. In the Bible, Caleb, at the age of 85 famously said, “I’ll take the mountain” (Joshua 14:10-12) and he led his tribe up the mountain in military conquest of the land promised to the Jews in the years after Moses.

It’s cruelty, discrimination and a lack of godly wisdom to let ageism affect your views, especially if you are a Christian who is dealing with and shepherding other Christians. If there is any place in this world where compassion and empathy should triumph, it is in Christian circles. So when there is discrimination and segregation according to age that goes on in Christian fellowships, it is particularly hurtful and unwise as well.

“But Mark, aren’t you creating division here? In saying these things you are dividing the body of Christ and encouraging division.”

I’ve thought about that. But if a person of color experiences racism, is it wrong of him to mention it? Or if a woman experiences sexism, should she remain silent? In the same way, I mean to cause no division by mentioning the fact that ageism exists. Rather, I hope that by talking about these things we can overcome them together and heal any divisions.

It takes a mature, seasoned person to not default to ageism when it comes to Christian shepherding. You just naturally want to hang out with your kind of folks. “Old people” can just seem like a drag if you”re not looking at things with the eyes of the Lord. But this is opposite of the ways of God’s Spirit. Paul said to Timothy, “Let no man despise your youth” (I Timothy 4:12). I think we can certainly say conversely to the ones who are 60 and older, “Let no man despise your age.”

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 One final thought: we’re all sinners; we’ve all been guilty of these things. Racism, sexism and ageism are part of the inborn sinful nature of mankind and all of us have been guilty of these things, and more, at one time or the other. So if you’ve been affected by ageism, it’s good to remember that. Jesus said, if someone sins against us, that we are to “go and tell him his fault” (Matthew 18:15) between he and you alone. Getting self righteous, bitter and unforgiving are some of the easy sins that those who’ve been sinned against can easily fall into. Lord help us all to forgive and strive for love and unity.