To me, suicide is a terrible, horrible thing. I’ve had times in my life where that thought came to me but there were just too many reasons not to do it. But it does seem to claim many lives in our times. Despair and hopelessness come upon us in mighty waves and to end our life seems to be the only way out. But what stopped me was to consider the effect it would have on others, particularly my children.
The Bible says, “None of us lives to himself and no man dies to himself.” (Romans 14:7) We all have influence. We are all in one way or the other tied to each other. “If one member suffers, the whole body suffers.” (I Corinthians 12:26) I’ve known people who’ve committed suicide. Some of them were good friends, others were people I knew or heard about. I have friends who had a parent who committed suicide when they were a kid. They didn’t talk about it much but I could tell it had a deep and severe effect on them.
Suicidal thoughts make you feel utterly separated from everyone else. In my view, it’s similar to those who commit murder, only in this case the person you kill is yourself, rather than someone else.
But it comes back to utter hopelessness, utter despair and an outlook that life has turned out so bad that there’s no reason left to live at all. But like I said, when I got to that point a few times, it was thinking about my children and the legacy it would leave them that turned me away from doing it.
Also, for those of us who believe in God and in Jesus, we just know better about the realities of life than to be taken over by such horrendously hopeless thoughts. If you know God and if you know His Word, you just know that however bad things look right now, it’s not really the end. No matter how much you blew it, no matter how much people mistreat you or abuse you or hate you, there’s Someone much greater than our present circumstances, no matter how bad they are.
The psalms of David, which are mostly prayers, are some of the most comforting and strengthening passages in the Bible. David certainly knew the utter depths of despair, hopelessness and even dread. He was very human, he said things he shouldn’t have said and did things that he shouldn’t have done. But still through it all the Lord never gave up on David and ended up mightily blessing his life. David said this one time,
My sore ran in the night and did not stop; my soul refused to be comforted. I remembered God and was troubled; I complained and my spirit was overwhelmed. You, God, keep my eyes awake. I am so troubled that I cannot speak. I have considered the days of old, the years of ancient times. I called to remembrance my song in the night. I commune with my own heart and my spirit made diligent search. Will the Lord cast off forever? Will he be favorable no more? Is His mercy completely gone forever? Do His promises fail for evermore? Has God forgotten to be gracious? Has He in anger shut up His tender mercies? And I said, “This is my infirmity. But I will remember the years of the right hand of the most High. I will remember the works of the Lord, surely I will remember Your wonders of old. I will meditate also of all Your work and talk of Your doings.” (Psalm 77:2-12)
King David knew the depths of despair and hopelessness. But what did he do in this prayer? He turned. He turned from a stream of hopelessness and began to say, “But I will remember…”, he actually says that three times in a row. David started to get his mind and train of thought on the faithfulness of God and God’s plan for his life, rather than the incredibly difficult circumstances he was in.
Let me change this around for a moment. I want to talk to you, from me to you. Are you being spoken to by thoughts of suicide? Maybe off and on for a long time? My friend, fight it. Or if you think you’re too weak to fight it, call out to God to deliver you. It’s not too big for Him.
If someone evil broke into your house and tried to carry off your children or even your dog, you’d fight them. Well, it’s worse than that. Someone has broken into the house of your mind and is trying to carry you off to your death.
And maybe you don’t even love yourself anymore but I venture to say others do. Others will miss you terribly. Others will be soul-struck that you are no longer here, that you are no longer part of their lives.
And even if you think you don’t have any friends or family, God Himself has got better ideas and plans for you than that you take your life. Why not give your life to help others? God specializes in using weak things, little things, nothings that He can make something out of.
God usually has to make absolutely nothing out of someone before He can use them. Maybe that’s where you are now.
But the devil comes along (and, yes, that’s who it is, the devil) and tries to tell you that it’s too late, you’re washed up and there’s nothing left to do but kill yourself. Jesus said of the devil that he was a murderer from the beginning and he’s trying to get you to commit murder, your own.
DON’T DO IT. Get help. Are you on some medication? A lot of those have side effects that bring on suicidal thoughts. You might need to check that out. Pour out your heart to God. Read the Bible, maybe the Psalms of David and let God’s Word speak to your heart. Fill your mind and heart with positive, encouraging, faith-building thoughts from the Word of God.
If your willpower doesn’t seem to work, try your “won’t power”. If you can’t find a way forward, at least you don’t have to start going backwards. Just slam on the breaks and sit tight in prayer and reading the Word until the storm passes.
It will. It did for me. I’ve been through this and I’m mighty glad I didn’t take my life in times of some of my darkest despair.
You are valuable to others and to God. You are loved and needed and you mater. Hold on. It can and will get better and you can go on to the light of a brighter day that will make the present darkness be something you eventually no longer remember. Hold on. You are loved and needed.

It can be those incredible moments of bonding and unity with your mate, where you know you are truly loving that person and are being loved. Even times with your best friend, sharing your heart, being listened to and understood, even that can be a form of intimacy. And of course the interactions we have with our families, when things are going really well, is also a degree of intimacy that can sometimes be sustained over many years.
But it’s also true that, “
And those things can bring joys and emotions that words sometimes can’t really reach.
Still, for me at least I yet yearn and long for intimacy in this world and I know that is not really going to come through cyberspace.
I’ve written before about
Do you want to have that person’s suicide haunt you the rest of your life? Or want to have that cruel thing you said and did eat away at your conscious the rest of your life? I have things I said when I was 12 years old to a friend of mine who was not as cool as the others and I, going along with the crowd, said some cruel thing to him. He looked me right in the eyes, with tears, and said, “You too, Mark?” He knew that I knew better. He expected me to not be like the other cruel kids in our class. It’s a horrible feeling to know I did that and I regret it to this day.
I believe it is just absolutely satanic to turn into the cruelest hatred what was once a love you had for someone. Maybe love has grown cold. Maybe “you’ve lost that loving feeling”. Maybe “you’ve seen them for what they are.” But we still owe everyone love to the degree that we can try to make it easy for the one we are breaking up with.
I expect that Luther fully understood the necessity of committing things to the Lord in prayer. One of the biggest changes in Luther’s life came in the middle of a lightning storm when he vowed to commit himself to the Lord if God would protect him through the storm.
Paul had committed it all to the Lord. He spoke of this to the Philippians, admonishing them to “
And of course it should go without saying that we also continue to be open to His leading and guiding on the mater we’re praying about.
But it disgusted me that I’d still cry from time to time. I wasn’t a Christian and I didn’t believe in God. I was just a normal, worldly young guy and the image you look up to is utter coolness, and actual coldness and hardness.
An obscure but amazing verse in Isaiah says, 

But I didn’t know who Jesus was. I’d come to know that God was real, I now knew the spiritual world was real and I’d even come to know that the devil was real. But I didn’t know who Jesus was or is. And those teenage, Bible-sharing “Jesus people” showed me through the Bible who Jesus was. So I received Him in prayer as they led me to do.
Jesus said to some, “
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Well, as I’m sure you know, that’s not right. Jesus gave what’s called “the great commission” in Mark 16:15 when He said to the disciples, “
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The book of Acts is just almost one continual testimony of this, with the disciples, in fits and starts, obeying the Lord and following the leading of the Holy Spirit. If you want to read about miracles happening to disciples, you should read the book of Acts. That’s the blueprint and plan for Christianity yet so few churches really take it seriously for our times.
Nope, that’s not what Peter said. In fact Peter directly disagrees with and says no to the Lord, as he had been prone to do from time to time in the past.
But Peter knew the Lord enough, loved the Lord enough and had gone through so many breakings and remakings that he somehow here obeyed, probably with some trepidation since good Jews were not supposed to hang out with Romans, which evidently those folks at the door were.
What does it mean to us in our times? The conditions of discipleship are pretty much still the same today. We still have to do the going. “
But the good news is, the Lord has already spoken in prophecy of these very times we live in. And somebody, maybe you, is going to fulfill those prophecies. It says of the very last days “
It is written. It is ordained. It’s already happened in the eyes of God. There are going to be victors in these final days, a called-out, separated-from-the-world discipleship church of the endtime who will be shining brightly, “doing exploits” and “instructing many” in the last days before the return of Jesus. They’ll be truly following God and the Lord will be working mightily with them, performing miracles on their behalf. I believe that’s the calling and heritage that is there for every person in this room. May the mighty God of Abraham and His Son Jesus help us to be what He has called us to be.
But it may not seem simple. You can wonder how you can get on board with all this. Where do I start? How can you “hear from God”? How can you “see God”? It does come back to your heart, your desires, your values. Jesus said in the Sermon on the Mount, “
Sadly for some, if not many, they never really get to that “walk” part.
It’s personal to me because I think it was personal to Solomon when he wrote it. I feel it may be a personal word from Solomon himself about his life and how it had gone. Solomon says, speaking of himself that the Preacher “
Many of us know of the story Jesus told of the “prodigal son”, the classic story of a “backslidden” son who finally “came to himself”, repented of his foolish ways and returned to his father. It’s all such a timeless story of contrition, “
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It’s a long story but the highlight of it all came when a wise woman in Israel was sent by David’s general, Joab, to appeal to the king about the matter. She said this to him in trying to find a way for David’s son to find grace in the eyes of his father. “
That verse brought hope again to my heart this morning as I thought about some dear loved ones who’ve continued for years to “
But in the infinitely merciful eyes of God, He sees an ember still there and has hope for the lost and rebellious when they seem past hope to us. These thoughts comforted my heart this morning when the outlook has continued to be bleak for some folks I love. It all really has to just be the Lord. “
That’s how it was for me and I’d just never experienced anything like that. After I came to faith in God and later in Jesus, I found that the truths I was finding in the Bible were more life-giving and truth-giving than anything I’d ever known before. But also I made a big mistake that probably a lot of people make. I figured the Bible is pretty much a normal book and so I figured that, like every other book, the only place to start is at the beginning. Well, that’s better than nothing but actually it’s probably not really the best.
He was talking to all kinds of people and He often really broke things down to the simplest language, many times using little stories and parables to help people understand deep truths. While it’s perhaps more satisfying to our ego to feel we’re intellectual giants because we’ve immersed ourselves in Plato or Voltaire, those guys can never really have the full ring of truth that Jesus did when He was here on earth.
For as the Father has life in himself, so has he given to the Son to have life in himself.
Recently one situation in particular has been special for me. A local language video I’ve done was going out to an Islamic country and I was getting feedback through Facebook. Yes, some of it could be called negative but I could tell that most of those responding had just never heard of 
But if you’re prejudiced and ignorant, if you’re pulsing with hate and spewing out animosity, falsehood and slander against those you oppose, then